How To Gain Confidence

Good morning my dear Minette

Minette by the pool

How to Gain Confidence is the best skill you can ever learn. Life gets a new meaning and lifts it to a whole new dimension.

Self-confidence refers generally to a sense of trust in your ability to control your life. Focus on your strengths and develop them. Be aware and careful not to get swallowed into the whirlpool of everyday life.

Confidence gives you courage and freedom of thought and makes you move outside your comfort zone to experience new opportunities

If not successful, confidence gives you the willpower to get up and try again until you succeed. Get the best knowledge and information for your goal and apply it.

Confidence comes from turning away from yourself and focusing on extending a helping hand to others. It is a process and a soft skill you can easily learn.

You will gain reassurance, confidence and courage when developing your strengths to find a way to help other people. These are the wise words of Simon Sinek.

Start with small improvements and slowly progress. Work hard to get better at your skills and confidence will follow.

Confidence gets its roots in kindness and helping others. It is a means of getting validation of your values and who you are, my dear. The capability to believe and most of all, trust and value yourself puts you in control. How gain confidence is not that difficult, you already have all the tools.

How to Gain Confidence Self Confidence, Heart, Hug, Love, Believe, Self Worth

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How To Gain Confidence

Let’s see what the life of a confident person looks like:

13 Qualities of a Confident Person

  • Positive attitude. Always see the bright side of a situation, be able to find solutions, be happy and laugh a lot. Be known as the friendly lady.

  • You love and accept who you are. Believe in yourself and know you are capable.

  • Respect is admiration for the values, behaviour and achievements of a person, that put them in high esteem. Be that person.

  • Be grateful for what you have and appreciate what others have. Never compare and feel envious, Be happy and feel thankful for what you have.

  • Only speak when you are certain of your facts and you can contribute with confidence. Refrain from saying “I don’t know”, rather say nothing.

  • Be modest, but do share your success if asked. The best is to ask questions and let other people tell you about their experiences, they love it. Bragging comes from low self-confidence.

  • Assertiveness is making statements in a firm tone of voice. It is a quality of self-assurance without being aggressive or rude. Think twice before speaking your mind and then do it calmly and diplomatically.

  • Do the right thing, and judge your behaviour against your values. To live with integrity feeds confidence.

  • Be authentic and an individualist with your own opinion. Don’t follow the crowd and become a nobody.

  • Live with responsibility. Stop blaming and complaining. Be accountable for your actions.

  • Stick to your word and do what you promised. You are a slave of your promises, make sure never to over-commit.

  • Dress for success. It brings confidence to look and feel good. Say to the mirror: “You look gorgeous” and then forget about it. Never dress sloppy, and always feel sexy and attractive, even when cleaning.

  • Hang out with people more powerful than you, people you want to learn from. Your environment influences who you are and how you behave. You become like the five people close to you every day. Have a good look around!


Screen with a written image : Believe in Yourself

How To Gain Confidence

What are my Strengths

Self-confidence comes from knowing who you are. Find your strengths and weaknesses. Everybody has a weakness or two. Know and acknowledge yours. Find people who will compensate for your weaknesses in your support group.


Do introspection and make a list of the things you love to do. Focus on how you would like to help other people and develop those skills. This is a good start. Those are the strengths to focus on to become an expert.

What are you good at

Identify your strengths:




I have patience

Disciplined and dedicated

Good organiser

Positive mindset

Motivating people

I am trustworthy, reliable and responsible

Compassionate and always ready to help

Find ways to become the ultimate master of your skills, and be an authority. One way to learn is to practice and practice, practice, practice.

Take courses and do self-study. No need to have a university degree. The practical knowledge you gain will create the confidence you want.


How To Gain Confidence


Someone with a spiritual belief has an anchor which will make them stronger. It gives you a sense of belonging. Whatever your belief is hold on to it and use it as your foundation to build a strong character for confidence.


How to develop a strong character

Love and Believe in Yourself

Accepted who you are and love yourself. They are two of the pillars of confidence. You will release dopamine in your body. It makes you feel excited, happy, and secure. You can do anything!

Inner Voice

Your inner voice has a way to feed fabricated negative information into your conscious mind and therefore, stealing your confidence.

Keep a watch over your thoughts, don’t let them have the last say.  Suppress and ignore it, kick it to the curb. Replace the negative with affirmations of gratitude and appreciation for the strengths you have, and focus on your achievements. You are worth it.

How to gain confidence. Self-Worth Quotes About Self-Love & Self-Esteem To Reference Every Time You Start To Doubt Yourself | YourTango



Previous generations believed, to be humble is a virtue, the same as being overly compassionate. It mostly occurs in the absence of self-pride and can be a threat to your confidence.

Your future and success are dependent on what you think and believe. Build a self-belief that you are capable of achieving anything and that nothing is going to stop you.

In confidence push the boundaries of your comfort zone, and find new exciting horizons.

Until next time, take care.


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Mom Estelle

Be Fabulous, Feisty and Fearless


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8 Comments on “How To Gain Confidence”

  1. It’s a difficult thing to acknowledge for some of us, that we were raised with negative inner voices. And because of this, we often don’t develop in confidence as we should. This has a negative impact on all aspects of the lives we build for ourselves.

    So our number one priority should be to try and overcome the negative programming we have developed while growing up.
    I agree that it is good to always have a positive attitude and positive expectations for what is to come.
    Gratitude for what we have helps up appreciate our lives as they are. And as you say, it always helps if we think before we speak and act. And then we will act with confidence knowing that when have thought about the best actions to take.

    Thanks for sharing.

    1. Thank you Andrew for your valuable and thoughtful comment!
      Most of the time we put ourselves last, it should be the other way round to live a fulfilled life.
      Thanks for stopping by.

  2. Hi Stella, It is so true! Thank you very much! Confidence is so important, no, essential for all of us! Having healthy boundaries does have such an impact on our social life! I have difficulties putting up my boundaries when I am at work. I can say what I think, but I fall for the need for nurses in my profession. I can’t say “No,” That is not good, but I can’t do anything about it!
    However, I am a person who says what I think, and I am very open about my opinion. Confidence is something we women need very much; it doesn’t matter what we work. I believe that we have many difficulties to be confident in our role as a woman. That is a pity! Because we are beautiful women who have so many strengths, yes many gifts. We need to use them! 🙂

    1. Hi Sylvia, so sorry my reply is so late but life just happened!

      So very true, boundaries are our safety net. In any situation it is always good to ask this question … does it benefit me and my mission? It is so important to put yourself first, only then will you have the strength to fulfil your task.
      If it does not enhance your life, it is wise to let it go. If not it might drain you of energy needed for a more important task. Self Worth and self love leads to faith in your beliefs and values. It gives you confidence, and to see the negative in perspective.
      Thank you so much for your comment I appreciate you stopping by again!

  3. While most of us are born with a healthy level of confidence, life throws us challenges that can derail our sense of confidence.
    Fear, self-doubt, and lack of confidence to overcome these fears are really dream killers.

    However, reclaiming that self-confidence is possible and worth every effort for living a more fulfilling life.
    The good thing is that it is absolutely doable.

    It won’t’ happen overnight, but our trying and dedication to pursue happiness and peace of mind would soon pay off. Eventually.

    Thank you for this, Estelle.


    1. Hi Femi, it is sad to see how many women lack confidence.
      Mostly it is the younger generation, or women in a controlling relationship having low self-esteem.
      This is meant to help them to gain their self-confidence again.
      Thank you very much for stopping by and leaving a comment! I appreciate it!
      Take care

  4. Wonderful post, you have enunciated all the key points that one needs to imbibe to nurture confidence. I also believe self acceptance plays a key role when it comes gaining confidence, majority of us compare ourselves to others and are not happy from the inside. If you are peaceful with yourself (the way you are) and accept it fully…then you take the first step towards growth.

    1. Hi Satz, so true, many people are trying to change themselves to become what they think society expects them to be. An image they have created in their mind, especially while young.

      Instead finding a purpose and the knowledge how to use it, gives you authority that leads to confidence.
      Confidence can only come when you know and accept who you are.

      Thank you very much for stopping by and your comment, I appreciate it.

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